Winter in Michigan

You know it's cold when -
...you step outside and your breath comes out in snowflakes.
...your mocha becomes a frappe before you get the window rolled up."
...you can see your snowman's breath."
...you're comparing your local temperature to International Falls."
... you drive 30 minutes to work and you and your car are still cold!"
... you can't feel your hands while wearing two pairs of gloves."
... you go out in freezing temperatures and say: 'I'll just grab a sweater.'"
... lol it's cooler in Miami than it is in Maine!"
... the cows are giving ice cream at milking time.
... the steam from your breath freezes your hair to your eyelashes.'"
... you have to ask if the temp is in Celsius or really Fahrenheit."
... your dog takes care of its 'business' in under 60 seconds."
... your tongue sticks to your own teeth."
... you step outside and it feels like your contacts will freeze and fall out of your eyes."
... you break the handle off your car door trying to open it because it's frozen shut."
... your electric bill is almost as much as your mortgage."
... the wood stove still isn't enough to keep your house above 62 degrees."